The Ideal Shidduch Profile: A Template with Guidance and Links
A ready profile structure for candidates, with guidance on what to emphasize and which articles to study for each section
A strong shidduch profile is not bureaucracy. It is your first clear and honest portrait. Below is a practical structure that helps a candidate and a shadchan quickly see what really matters.
1. Basic Info
Full name, including Hebrew name. Accuracy matters for identification and for name-related questions.
Age and date of birth. Age should be stated with full honesty.
Height and appearance. Keep it factual, without self-promotion or loaded adjectives.
Marital status. Never married / divorced / widowed.
Location and willingness to relocate. It helps to clarify views on Eretz Yisrael, the Diaspora, and community type.
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2. Hashkafa and Goals
Religious background. Chabad, Litvish, Modern Orthodox, yeshiva student, and so on.
Learning plans. Especially for men: kollel, fixed learning hours, work plus learning.
Public mission or shlichus orientation. Is the candidate hoping to build a home that shines outward?
Standards of tzniut. External presentation should match internal convictions.
Related articles: 5 Things the Rebbe Advises Before Starting Shidduchim
3. Education and Professional Path
Educational history. Yeshivos, seminaries, and meaningful stages of growth.
Current occupation. Work, study, business, or shlichus.
Life aspirations. It is helpful to say honestly where the person hopes to be in ten years.
Related article: Why the Rebbe Advised Not to Wait for the Perfect Time to Marry
4. Middot and Character
Brief self-description. Focus on middot, not decorative details.
How you relate to others. Give concrete examples of kindness, patience, resilience, and response to difficulty.
Role models. Who shapes your standards and whom do you look up to?
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5. Looking For
Personality type. Quiet, energetic, leadership-oriented, warm, intellectual, open, and so on.
Religious level. Look for an equal, not for someone to “fix.”
Deal-breakers. Smoking, a certain city, willingness to relocate, type of home, and similar issues.
6. References and Checks
Dor Yeshorim number. An important part of responsible preparation for a future family.
References. Rabbi, teacher, family friend, and peer who know the person in real life.
Health. Serious chronic conditions should be prepared for proper disclosure at the right stage.
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Filling Guidance
Focus on what matters. Outer details often fade, while inner qualities carry a home for years.
Honesty without exaggeration. Facts must not be distorted, but it is right to present oneself clearly and positively.
Readiness for action. A profile is your practical vessel, your hishtadlus.
Confidentiality. A shadchan must guard this profile and share it only with people who truly need it for shidduch purposes.
Related article: Why Finding a Spouse Is Like Searching for a Lost Item
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